new year

New Year. Old questions. And new ones. Do I have anything fresh to answer them with? Maybe. Just maybe.

This year I want to respect my creative self a bit more. Give it more air time. Let it breathe and stretch. Help it grow by giving it some sunshine and also pushing it off the front porch when it's time to go to work everyday. I wonder how I do this?

Julia Cameron says it's all about 'recovery'. As in 12 steps and facing your demons and believing enough to start dreaming again. How did she get this audacious I also wonder -- to believe that the Universe will answer if you start throwing those attempts out like fishing line into a deep, dark pool? The Universe will fill your net and you'll bring in the haul. Whatever the haul might look like -- I think it's different for each person.

Her Universe. My God. I think he'll answer. It's just his answers I am scared of.

Another thing: avoidance.

How much avoidant behaviour is bad? To avoid crossing the street when cars are whizzing past is a good thing. To avoid hard situations and crap you just don't want to with other people or with yourself can be okay in the short term, but what do you do in the long term when you feel you don't have answers for the questions that prompted the avoidance in the first place?

I'll leave you with that for the day.